Thursday, June 23, 2005

Old Glory Flambé

I personally do not believe in burning the flag. It's a personal belief, but I'll tell you something, I think people are overreacting, oh, just a little bit.

"Hey buddy, my daddy died for that flag."

Well, I bought mine. Sorry. You know they sell them at K-Mart for three bucks, you're in, you're out, brand new flag, no violence was necessary.

"Hey buddy, my daddy died in the Korean war for that flag."

What a coincidence -- my flag was made in Korea! No one, and I repeat, no one ever died for a flag. A flag is a piece of cloth. They might have died for freedom, which is also of course the freedom to burn the fucking flag.


-Bill Hicks

We need him back.
House Passes Flag Burning Amendment.

Sunday, June 19, 2005

Weekend In Review

Friday: Saw Batman again (just as good). 

Saturday: Tried to kill myself (Using whiskey and a water slide).

Sunday: Wanted to kill myself (Because of the whiskey).

Steven Zimmerman still knows how to throw one hell of a party.  The festivities started at one p.m. (I have no idea why he likes to get things started so late.)  I arrived to discover a giant inflatable water slide in the back yard.  I did not have a swimsuit, but I figured after a couple of jack and cokes would cancel any concerns I had about that.  After quite an ordeal setting up the inflatable swimming pool to go at the bottom of the slide, I decided I was ready for the slide.  A particular combination of the whiskey and memories of childhood antics growing up on a lake, I began hurling myself down the slide in a variety of dangerous ways.  Back and front flips, twists, upside down, whatever.  Although I didn't know it at the time, I seriously fucked up my ankle, and can barely walk today.  I also have a nice variety of bruises and scratches.

Anyway, things get kind of fuzzy after that, but I remember being extorted out of eleven dollars over a matter of sunglasses that I supposedly broke.  I'm not real sure how I made it home.  I do know that I drank the whole bottle of whiskey.

Today, I've been paying for it big time.  Hangovers multiplied by pain and soreness from the slide hijinks make for a miserable day.  But, that's the price you pay, I guess.

Thanks for a great time Steve.

Thursday, June 16, 2005

Movie Review: Batman Begins

Wow.

It has been 12 hours now since I left the theater after seeing Batman Begins, and I am still tingling from it.  Short review:  Absolutely amazing.  Go watch it as soon as possible.  For a longer review, there will be lots and lots of spoilers, so DO NOT READ until after you've seen the movie.

First off, let me say that Batman is my favorite comic book hero.  I've always been drawn to the notion that here is a guy with no mutant abilities, no alien powers, no genetic alterations, no magic powers, yet he is willing to throw himself out there and stand in the way of the bad guys in order to do what is right.  He's a guy who will fight tooth and nail against corruption in politics and the police as much has he fights the Joker.  He's a guy that can beat ANYONE by proper implementation of force, intimidation, and tools.

And this is the first Batman move that understands that.  While I certainly liked the first Batman movie, think back to and and what is the first thing that comes to mind?  The Joker, of course.  And also Tim Burton's design for Gotham City, which was incredible.  Jack Nicholson's Joker was great, but it completely dominated that movie.  Michael Keaton as Batman just kind of floated through the movie as a foil to The Joker, not the other way around.  Batman Returns was almost even worse in that regard.  In that movie, Burton tried to explain the character of Batman through the bad guys:  Catwoman represents his obsession, Penguin his alienation, and Max Shreck his cool calculation and intelligence.  And the actual character of Batman stood stiffly in the middle of it.  Let's just pretend that Batman Forever and Batman and Robin don't exist.  We'll be better for it.

Batman Begins, on the other hand, puts Batman front and center.  This movie has more villains and supporting characters than any of the previous movies, yet the focus stays on Batman.  While all the other movies throw in an allusion to Bruce Wayne's childhood traumas, Batman Begins digs deep to show how his childhood discovery of the Cave led to his fear of bats, which directly tied into his feelings of guilt and responsibility when his parents are murdered.  It shows how a lost young man watches a corrupt system let his parents' murderer free, then take away any chance of him exacting revenge on his own.  It shows how an obsession with crime and criminals can lead down a path of darkness, yet that a good man can still stand up and say No More.

I love how everything is this movie seems plausible.  While Tim Burton's Gotham city was fantastic, this Gotham seems real.  Not that the three-tiered elevated train or whatnot represent things in the real world, but that Gotham has the feeling of a living, breathing city.  There are nice sections and poor sections.  There are highways that look like people use them and buildings that look like people live and work in them.  Nothing like Schumacher's neon hell (oh wait, I forgot those ones don't exist).  There is architecture from different eras that blend to give the city a specific look, not just Burton's extreme Gothic design.  Everything in this movie uses that strategy.  Batman's tools are discarded military technology.  The bat cave is an actual cave located underneath Wayne Manor, not a massive cathedral that looks like it took a large construction crew years to hollow out and build.  This movie sells itself instead of asking the audience to just accept that these thing exist, and it's all the better for it.

I love how this movie knows its roots.  Burton and Schumacher tried to make Batman their own, but in this movie you can see Frank Miller, Grant Morrison, and Denny O'Neil (the best Batman comic writers ever).  A lot of geeks have criticized the changes to the Batmobile, but in addition to being a semi-plausible urban assault vehicle, it looks very similar to the one from The Dark Knight Returns by Miller.  Also the characterization of Sargent Gordon is almost identical to Batman: Year One, also by Miller.  I'm almost certain that Gordon even gave the same speech about "Escalation" as he did at the end of the movie.  The Ra's al Ghul and the League of Shadows stuff is pure O'Neil.

Not that director Christopher Nolan and the cast didn't leave their mark on the movie as well.  Playing around with the timeline has always been one of Nolan's trademarks, and here he deftly maneuvers from present day back and forth into Wayne's past.  Also the visual effects of Scarecrow's fear gas is very well done.  Nolan understands that Batman's best offensive weapon is fear, and when Batman first attacks a group of drug smugglers at the docks, it plays out more like a scene from Alien than your traditional superhero ka-powing the baddies.  When Liam Neeson's character Ducard is training Wayne early in the movie he taunts Bruce by calling out the various styles that Wayne is trying to use, then telling him that "It's not a dance" as he promptly kicks Bruce's ass.  You see that come out later as Batman is fighting with a ferocity you don't see in the ballet/kung fu fighting that is so popular nowadays.

Neeson, Michael Caine as Alfred, Morgan Freeman as Lucius Fox, and Garry Oldman as Gordon are all amazing actors that, instead of overpowering the film with their presence (a la Nicholson in the first Batman), blend completely into their characters, never letting you forget that this is a Batman movie.  Cillian Murphy (the guy from 28 Days Later) was perfectly cast as The Scarecrow.  I was all prepared to hate Katie Holmes, but I actually enjoyed her role in the movie.  She gets one of the best lines toward the end when she hammers home the point that Bruce Wayne is nothing but a mask, that Batman is what is real. (although, like with the first move and Vicky Vale, I really don't understand why they think Batman feels the need to reveal his identity to every skirt that comes through the Batcave).

I officially forgive Christian Bale for American Psycho (a movie that I hate to my very core).  Michael Keaton was basically a stiff cardboard figure in the first two Batmans.  Val Kilmer got the Bruce Wayne: Millionaire Playboy right in Batman Forever, but that's about it.  I do not recognize George Cloony as an actual Batman.  But Bale hits the role note-perfect.  His drunken playboy antics are hilarious.  His quiet intensity as the 'real' Bruce Wayne is great.  And his Demon of the Night Batman voice will send chills up your spine.  Incredible.

I guess I wouldn't be a true geek if I didn't do a little complaining.  #1.  As much as Nolen did to sell everything in the movie as plausible, the Microwave Cannon that Ghul was using to vaporize the drug laced water would have cooked anyone standing around it like they were siting in a microwave oven.  #2.  Why didn't they use Danny Elfman's iconic Batman Theme?!?  They could have easily incorporated it with the rest of the soundtrack (which, while not particularly memorable did set the mood quite well).

But those are just minor quibbles.  The movie is amazing.  Its the Batman movie that I've always wanted.  Anyone want to go see it again?

Thursday, June 09, 2005

post by: Ima Freak

In case you guys haven't noticed, I've got some pretty severe anti-social tendencies.

"Nooo Wiley, say it ain't so!"

While I'm very aware that its not that healthy, its something that I've come to accept about myself.  But every now and then I have a moment when I have to step back and say "Wow, am I really that bad?"

I took my car into the shop yesterday (the check engine light was on, and checking oil and other fluids is about all I know in regards to car maintenance).  I was sitting in the waiting room with my iPod plugged securely in my ears, listing to a podcast of This Week in Tech when an old woman walked in and sat down across from me.  I of course ignored her, opening a copy of USA Today to make it as obvious as possible that I was occupied.  But then one of the shop guys came in to ask me something, so I had to let my guard down for a moment, and as soon as the guy left, she pounced.  Now let me be clear, there was nothing wrong with her.  She was actually very nice and also intelligent (usually not the case from random strangers that you meet in a waiting room).   But the whole time there was a voice  in my head screaming, "WHY WON'T THIS STUPID BITCH SHUT UP!!!"  There was a much smaller voice going "Jesus, Wiley, WTF is wrong with you?"

At any rate, my momma raised me right, so I just sat there and was very polite, until they told her that her car was ready (about 20 minutes later), at which point I just about collapsed from the relief of her being gone.

Terrible.


Tuesday, June 07, 2005

Dumb and Dumberer

I just found this link amusing . . .

Yale Grades Portray Kerry as a Lackluster Student

Yet another reason to vote Libertarian.

Thursday, June 02, 2005

I always thought it was Linda Lovelace myself

I've been following the whole revelation of Deep Throat's identity news story pretty closely these past couple of days.  It turns out that the secret informant who helped bring down a president was none other that Mark Felt (who?), the number two man at the FBI.  He has always been on the short list of suspects, but his name never has as much sex appeal as the heavy hitters like Alexander Haig or Pat Buchanan.  The coverage has been . . . . interesting.  I don't know what I expected, but this wasn't it.  I guess I really expected it to be a "really big deal" rather than just a "huh, that's interesting" kind of thing.  I guess time does heal all wounds.  Still, I feel that it really says something about our culture when Deep Throat takes second fiddle to the Michael Jackson trial.

What I've been most surprised by is the anti-Deep Throat reaction.  I guess that I've been brainwashed by All The President's Men and the like, but I've never even really considered that Deep Throat was anything other than someone who was trying to right a serious wrong in the government.  I know we live in very conservative times, and I do know people who to this day claim that Nixon was a completely innocent  and great man brought down by an out of control liberal media, but I had thought that the nation as a whole had come to terms with the fact that Nixon had done some very inappropriate things and that the final resolution to the Watergate scandal was the right thing to do.

With that said, some of the anti-Throat people that the media are dragging up might not be the best voices of reason on the subject.  I was flipping around  yesterday and came across G. Gordon Liddy on MSNBC explaining how unethical and immoral a thing that Mark Felt had done.  (Quick history lesson for the kiddies: Liddy was the guy who actually broke into the Watergate hotel).

At any rate, let's get cracking on what's really important.  A 30th anniversary special edition of All the President's Men with all new special features on Felt!